Many contemporary psychologists believe personality is distilled into five fundamental dimensions, commonly known as the “Big Five” personality traits. A nuanced understanding of these traits, and what it signifies to score high or low in each, can provide profound insights into one’s own personality. This discussion focuses on leveraging the Big Five to cultivate optimal habits tailored to your unique characteristics. Since habits form the foundation of our lives, it is crucial that they align with our aspirational self. The challenge lies in the fact that not all habits are universally beneficial; this guide aims to direct you toward habits that best suit your individual needs and goals.
The “Big 5” Personality Traits
Lets begin by understanding what the Big Five are:
Extraversion
This is sociability, ranging from reserved/solitary (introverted) to outgoing/energetic (extroverted).
Conscientiousness
Also known as thoughtfulness, ranging from haphazard/careless to organized/mindful.
Openness
This is creativity and intrigue, ranging from cautious/consistent to curious/inventive.
Agreeableness
Or kindness, ranging from challenging/detached to friendly/compassionate.
Neuroticism
Meaning emotional stability, ranging from anxious/sensitive to confident/stable.
This study shows the 4 main archetypes that most people fall into based on the Big 5:
- Average: High levels of extroversion and neuroticism, and low levels of openness
- Self-centered: High extroversion, low levels of openness, agreeableness, and conscientiousness.
- Reserved: Low extroversion, neuroticism, and openness. High conscientiousness and agreeableness
- Role Model: High on all traits except neuroticism
Habits to Harness
Now I will give you the best habit for your specific Big 5 personality type. Each habit is tailored around specific traits, creating the most useful adaptation for you.
Painful Disconnect (Average)
For this purpose, “average” simply means that you experience and interpret the world similarly to the majority of people. Today’s average is not the same as the average of 30 years ago. Although there are many reasons for this, let’s focus on the most powerful factor: the advancement of technology.
People today have come to desire a deeper sense of approval and connection, hence the prevalence of high levels of extraversion. Additionally, due to the comparative nature of social media and the dependency on it for happiness, there have been drastic effects on mental health and emotional stability (high levels of neuroticism).
With this being said, it seems that the most beneficial habit for today’s “average” individual involves a mindful use of social media and the internet. The answer to this is what I refer to as the “Painful Disconnect”; embracing the state of boredom which is both feared and misconceived.
With constant avenues to escape our own thoughts, we lose our sense of self. But the benefits of disconnecting go beyond self-awareness and are truly eye-opening; new-found motivation, heightened creativity, and the defeat of procrastination. When we experience what doing nothing truly feels like, we disconnect from the addiction to technology and reconnect to what matters most to us.
Forcing ourselves to be present has real, practical advantages. Tasks that previously seemed tedious or futile become easy to execute. The lack of focus disappears with a regained control of direction. Ideas start to flow from streams that were previously blocked by overstimulation. Happiness levels even increase, as our dopamine baseline comes back down from space.
If you constantly numb yourself with activities that create large increases in dopamine, everything else will seem dull and meaningless. This is not a reality anyone wants, yet so many of us today have come to accept it without even realizing. The Painful Disconnect opens the door to a different reality, one that encourages the best version of ourselves.
New Shoes (Self-centered)
While there isn’t anything inherently wrong with a strong sense of self-love, it can leave you vulnerable to weaknesses when taken too far. The upside from individuals deemed “self-centered” is robust emotional stability stemming from a deep understanding of themselves. However, they become closed off to other people’s perspectives and disregard new experiences (low openness & agreeableness). This is because they don’t want to compromise the strong identity they have cultivated.
One of the most common obstacles when forming new habits is the inability to firstly accept a new identity in order to fully embrace yourself. So, when looking at the “self-centered” type, the best habit to adapt is “New Shoes”. When you buy shoes, they fit your foot, match your style, and show others your purchasing power. So, why would the “self-centered” type need anymore shoes? New Shoes, instead, is a form of putting yourself in the shoes of someone else.
The kid with dirty, ragged clothes, the girl who has been outcast, the guy who faces endless hardship. You may not give much thought into what these people’s lives look like, New Shoes requires a mindset of humility and sincerity. Challenge yourself to put others needs before your own, and take other’s feelings into account for every interaction. Be intentional about how you engage with your peers, treating them as your equal. Acknowledge everyone has different strengths, as well as deal with their own struggles.
The harsh truth is that today has become a society that idolizes narcissism. There are of course different degrees of narcissistic behavior, but the more we obsess over ourselves the less room we have for others. Ask your self how big your ego is, truly asses the areas in which you could be more open.
New Shoes is quite contrarian to today’s cultural standards, and thats precisely why it is perfect for someone who may be self-centered. Stepping outside of social norms will allow you to see people in a new way; a way that dismisses pride and invites humiliation. Step into someone else’s shoes, you may witness a transformation within your heart.
The Leap (Reserved)
The “reserved” type has the lowest levels of extraversion, as the name might suggest. They prefer solitude and deal well with stress on their own. Plus, they often have great empathy for others and the ability to maintain structure in their life (high agreeableness & conscientiousness).
However, the “reserved” type has one crucial flaw, an inability to step outside of their comfort zone. While some may have built taller walls than others, they find themselves within self-imposed limitations. It can be very difficult to form new relationships, and new experiences produce fear and anxiety. The antidote to this combination of emotions is “The Leap”.
Rather than a mere step, The Leap demands you to surpass the limits you’ve succumbed to. Immerse yourself in something you never imagined doing, things you believed were beyond your capabilities. Learn a new skill, join a group, start a business. There is only one obstacle in the way: You.
The world is filled with uncharted seas, less-traveled roads, and unsettled territories. If you want to expand your identity, you have to go beyond your horizon of comfort. For those who are “reserved”, this may seem pointless as you are content with what you know. Instead, acknowledge the ways you have remained stationary and neglected growth. The key understanding is that you will never find your full potential or purpose without The Leap.
How can we find our true calling confined in a box that barely fits us? This is something you must think about if you desire fulfillment. The time will never be “just right”, but action is a necessity.
Thomas Jefferson said, “If you want something you’ve never had, you must be willing to do something you’ve never done.” What have you never attempted that you wished you had? Take The Leap, you won’t regret it.
Endless Pursuit (Role Model)
I may have saved the best for last. Some individuals dedicate a great deal of effort into simply being a good human. These individuals possess an acute awareness of how the world and people function, driven by a genuine desire to make a positive impact wherever they go. This is the “role model” type. They are sensible, organized, creative, caring, and easy to talk to. Not everyone can acquire these traits, and most aspire to live up to their standards.
What kind of habit might elevate the “role model” to even more of an overachiever? Well, everyone is bound to make mistakes, or fall short to their own standards. The habit needed not only enhances current characteristics, but also ensures to maintain an upward trajectory. Enter the “Endless Pursuit”: an ever-present eagerness to learn more, seek improvement, and spread positivity.
Such a habit is unattractive to most, but when there isn’t anywhere else to look but up, the Endless Pursuit becomes the ultimate goal. It is a mindset that combats complacency, serving as a reminder of how far you’ve come. Whether you deem yourself successful yet or not, it is important remember that the only way to fail is quitting.
Constantly absorbing new knowledge makes it exceedingly difficult to underachieve. However, this notion must be approached with focus and intentionality. Keep your goals in mind, and put acquired knowledge into action. A strong moral compass will guide your direction, all you have to do is stay consistent in your effort.
Part of the pursuit is always having something to pursue; if the end goal is unclear, the pursuit loses its purpose. Perhaps you have a role model of your own, whom you’ve looked up to and shifted your personality toward. Chase what they have achieved, no concept is too lofty. Take each day as one step closer towards creating a profound impact.
Never stop learning, for life will never stop teaching. This is the essence of the Endless Pursuit, facing each day with tenacity for improvement. Broaden perspectives, expand knowledge, and challenge understanding. There is no limit to what we can learn, so why not commit to pursuing life to its fullest extent.
Adaptable Apps
These apps will allow you to adapt the habits above into your life seamlessly.
One Sec
With One Sec, you can gain control over compulsive behaviors triggered by the addictive algorithms of smartphone apps. Here’s how it works: when you attempt to open a designated app, a screen appears prompting you to “take a deep breath,” followed by a counter showing how many times you’ve tried to access that app. This brief pause reduces your brain’s craving for instant dopamine hits, a method proven effective by the Max Planck Institute for Human Development. This small action can lead to significant changes, helping you regulate sleep patterns, improve mental health, and enhance productivity. By taking just one second to curb your impulses, you can transform your habits.
Forest
Our phones are always within reach while working, providing little resistance to procrastination and doomscrolling. However, Forest introduces a novel way to counter this tendency by adding stakes to your phone usage. When you start a task, open Forest, and a virtual tree begins to grow. The longer you stay focused, the more your tree flourishes. Each tree you cultivate remains in the app, tracking your productive sessions. By gamifying productivity, Forest offers a simple yet effective incentive to enhance your focus and increase your productivity.
Stats for success
Brief Bullets
Each of us have our own strengths and struggles. As a result, some habits are uniquely defined to optimize our specific personality. Here are some takeaways: